Monday, May 24

Sunshine
It's not black Monday anymore. The fog has shifted from around my head and I'm back in the land of the living. Time for a positive and uplifting list.

Things to look forward to:
  • The Hay Festival
    I'm going there on Saturday to be all cultured and arty. Maybe I will be inspired to become a writer
  • Going Home
    Cooking some nice food, and cosying up in my newly-cleaned house and reading Saturday's Guardian (I know it's Monday, but I never get round to it on the weekend)
  • Getting Le Chat
    Zebedee-Dave, our rescue cat, arrives on Sunday. Much miaowing in the house. Can I rename him Chairman Miaow?
  • The Summer
    It will be full of beautiful sunshine, lovely friends, cold wine, great music, lush food and lots of laughter and love and lovely things

Black Monday
Today I feel horrible.
And fat.
And sluggish.
And sad.
And ugly.
And unpopular.
And, let's face it, a little bit sorry for myself too.

A bad, bad combination. Stay away from the strange crying woman in the corner.

Thursday, May 20

Those Poor Children
Just looking through the one of our local papers - the Rhondda Leader - and have come across a bonny baby competition. Here are a few of the babies' names.
  • Casie Marie
  • Blake Leigh
  • Blayne
  • Levi (a little girl)
  • Macey Jayne
  • Cody
  • Finleigh Corbus
  • Rio Harley
  • Callum Darren
  • Kian


Crikey.

Wednesday, May 19

Stilton matricide!
It's a Googlewhack - I found one!!! After trying echidna pedagogy (78 matches), custard arachnid (187) and curmudgeon possum (319), I succeeded.

Blimey - between blogging and Googlewhacking, I am turning into a proper geek.

Tuesday, May 18

Googlewhacking
I went to see Dave Gorman's Googlewhack Adventure on Saturday - and it was amazing.

Being very busy at work, I thought I would try to find a Googlewhack on my blog. Haven't found one, but I have come across a band called Big Yoga Muffin.
Poet But Don't You Know It
OK, OK, I take it all back. I used to hate The Streets, but now I realise that Mike Skinner - like Eminem - is a poet for our generation. His lyrics are so clever - a really accurate observation of mass youth culture in Britain Today (got my Cultural Studies head on there).

The album is brilliant, and when you listen to it all the way through, you realise it's got a little story running through and all the songs are linked. Genius.

Anyway, I've got to stop writing a minute to get chips and drinks.

Monday, May 17

Men in Skirts
I watched Troy at the cinema last night. Here's my review:

"I just kept wishing it was over"

What a load of old rubbish. Here's why:
  • Bad, bad acting
    Brad Pitt - wooden. Eric Banner - oh dear. And why, oh why, did Sean Bean have a Northern English accent?

  • Too 'Hollywoodised'
    So apparently they had razors in ancient Greece - although only the young, handsome warriors like Brad Pitt and Orlando Bloom got to use them.

  • Too many long fight scenes
    They just kept going on and on.

  • A distinct lack of wooden-horse action
    Surely the best bit of the story, but given only about 2 minutes of screen time. More horse action please!


That's it, I've had it with epics. They are pants.
I Am a Runnist!
Did the 5km Race for Life yesterday - in the blistering midday sun - in a v impressive 37 minutes! I only started running about six weeks ago, so I'm mega impressed with my time.

Friday, May 14

The Intelligent Office
People are strange, as Jim Morrison once said. I work in an office full of supposedly intelligent people, but here is one of the conversations I heard today.

Person A: What's soya sauce?
Person B: It's that black stuff you get in Chinese food.
A: No, that's soy sauce. But what's soya sauce?
B: Oh, I'm not sure. Aren't they the same?
A: No, soya sauce is different from soy sauce.
(Person C joins the conversation)
Person C: Soya sauce is that funny white stuff that vegetarians eat.
A & B: Oh yeah, that stuff.

Miss Meep (thinks): What is wrong with you people? There's no such thing as soya sauce! Do you never eat anything apart from Findus Crispy pancakes and Pot Noodles?




Biscuit-related website
I don't know about you, but what I really fancy is a nice cup of tea and a sit down.
Cakey delight
Feeling a bit down - boo!

Just about to eat a banana muffin - yay!

Thursday, May 13

Fire, Fire, Mrs Dyer!
Last night, I almost set my kitchen on fire. I put some olive oil in a pan to fry some onions, switched on the gas, then saw my neighbour in her garden, so popped outside to say hello.

She likes a chat does my neighbour, so when I returned to the kitchen 10 minutes later, said pan of oil was smoking violently, and quite literally about to burst into flames. You're supposed to keep calm in these situations, so I started screaming and running about like a distressed chicken. Luckily, husband came and rescued me, and all was well (although the whole house smells like an accident in a plastic manufacturing factory).

Reminds me of that old Chinese proverb: "Don't chit chat when there's fat in the pan". Or something.
Bloggers
I've just been reading lots of other people's blogs, and realised that mine is RUBBISH!

Wednesday, May 12

Bugger

Thought I'd be all creative and change my template, and now I've lost all my links. Bugger.
Homeless Muffin
Yesterday, I wanted to buy a muffin for a homeless man, but my lovely husband thought I should give him money instead, as he might not like the muffin.

How can anyone not like muffins, especially if they are hungry? Muffins make you happy and fill you up. He may have used the quid I gave him to buy booze, which makes you even hungrier and often quite sad too.

And now the muffin is homeless too. Although its brother found its way into my belly. And its other brother found a home in the stomach of my lovely husband.

Friday, May 7

Friday Frenzy
Hurrah! It's Friday. The sun is shining. I just ate figs for breakfast (how decadent!). My sunflower seeds are sprouting up all over the place. I'm going to visit my mam and dad's later. And Damien Rice is on Jonathan Ross tonight. Life is good.

Wednesday, May 5

A Nice List
I haven't got any 'burning issues' to write about today, so I thought I'd write a list of things that make me happy.
  • Lambs, especially when they are gamboling
  • Sunflowers, and daisies and gerberas too
  • Sunshine - but where is it?
  • Beaches
  • Spaniels - mine's going to be called Broccoli Sausage
  • Glitter - add instant sparkle to your life
  • The colour pink - I've managed to get it two rooms in my house!
  • My lovely, cakey husband
  • Dark chocolate
  • Exercise endorphins - who needs booze and Es?
  • Bunnies, or anything fluffy and cute
  • Good books - currently Midnight's Children
  • Bubble baths
  • Cooking good food
  • My friends - beautiful, intelligent, funny and fab
  • Trees and grass and all of Mother Nature's garden
  • Films - entertaining and you get to cosy up the dark and eat sweets too