Thursday, January 19

It's a confusing time
Being 30 is really odd. In lots of ways, I feel more confident - I've got a great house, a brilliant relationship, lots of lovely friends and I've totally stopped worrying about my looks and what other people think of me.

But - and it's a big old but (and, in fact, a big old butt thanks to the Christmas lard-fest) - I'm just confused about what I want out of life.

I hate my job but I'm too scared to leave it. I know what makes me happy, but I don't know if I'm good enough at any of these things to make them into a career. I love the city but I also dream of running away and living in the middle of nowhere. I want babies, but I don't want to become a 'professional parent' and lose sight of who I am. In fact, who am I?

I'm confused, I'm scared, I've got too many things buzzing around my head and I change my mind about everything on a daily basis. Sometimes there are so many things going on in there that I think my head might explode.

What shall I do? Find religion? Turn to drink? Book myself into an asylum?


1 comment:

  1. Just read a really interesting book yesterday - whole book in one day (quite small)- called 'Healing your Inner Child'. It's American...and a bit full-on in parts, but gave me a great insight in to the constant running around and battle between peace and serenity and 'ACHIEVEMENT'. Basically you have to heal your inner child (man) and I guess you will find truth and clarity - I am not at that stage yet, but feel much better tday with my new insight.

    I think alcohol, cake, and the asylum are also a gd idea as a backup